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A Reason and Time for Every Matter Under Heaven… Even for a Samurai Warrior

A Reason and Time for Every Matter Under Heaven… Even for a Samurai Warrior

A Swallow-tail Butterfly Took to the Air...

A Swallow-tail Butterfly Took to the Air…


When Unspoken Grief Speaks

I turned 40 years old last week.  Today is the thirty-fifth anniversary of my mother’s death in a car accident.  For practically my whole life, the turning of the next year in my life and my mom’s death have been inextricably linked.  I can’t think of one without t


Since you've been gone

I keep thinking you're coming back.

I waited, day and night

But you never came.

Now...I am so torn...

At Times

At times the pain is so fresh
I can feel the stabbing through my heart.
Then there are times when
I can breathe normally.

At times I can almost
Smell your cologne. 
Then there are times when
I have a hard time seeing your face.

At times I think
I'll never be happy again. 
Then there are times when
I feel myself smile.

I Am a Phoenix

“I am a phoenix.”  We have all seen the commercials on TV where people are touting their degree from the online university.  Well, I am a phoenix also, but not the university kind.  I am like the mythical phoenix which was consumed by fire and arose from the ashes a new creature. This is my story.

Beloved son, brother, uncle, friend, and boyfriend

I’ve never been a stranger to grief. My mother and stepbrother were killed in a car accident when I was very young, and of course, almost every child experiences the loss of at least one grandparent. By the time I was twenty-one, I figured I could handle anything grief could throw my way. I felt incredibly strong, confident, and optimistic about the future. I had a great family, awesome friends, and an amazing boyfriend. I felt unstoppable.

Father's Day: One Year Later

O Muses, O high genius, now assist me!
O memory that didst write down what I saw,
Here thy nobility shall be manifest!
  ~ Canto II, The Inferno, The Divine Comedy Dante Alighier

Tattoos and Memories

Midway upon the journey of our life
I found myself within a forest dark,
For the straightforward pathway had been lost.

Canto 1, The Inferno, The Divine Comedy
~ Dante Alighieri


 As I drive down this desolate road, one more time, I see an all too familiar and re-occurring site. It is almost dark, it is cold and raining and I instantly know what it is. There it is, a silouette in the distance, merging closer, yet closer. There it stands now, very still. I see it clearly, so barren, so self explanatory, so lifeless. The "vision" says it all.
Again, I know all too well what I must do as I start to pray.

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