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I'm Grieving, Now What?

The Grief Toolbox is providing our user contributed articles as well as aggregated articles from a variety of blogs. Please join our community and comment on the articles, let us and others know what you found helpful and that you did not. Together we can help each other as well as future travelers on their grief journey. We are also always looking for additional contributors; if you see a topic you would like to share your thoughts on, please submit content.

It bothers me when: I get introduced to someone as John. And there is no Michelle. That, in itself, is a moment of Hell.

It bothers me when: They think that I am a single man. Because I am not. I was wed. And she is dead.



I found myself on this journey rather suddenly
There was no warning; no sign up ahead

My life was almost perfect it seemed
My heart swelled with complete joy at where I was

I was so excited about the future
The great things we had planned

And then, it happened
Your heart just stopped beating

How could this be happening?
Was this real?



When I first started facilitating bereavement groups, I sort of assumed that people would be coming for help for “just” one loss. Of course one loss is more than enough…it’s already toomuch. Yet so many...


It seems to me before Joey died I had many friends! I was happy, lived in a good neighborhood, had had a good job, my kids were successful, on and on. Who wouldn't want to be a friend or at least an acquaintance?

My boy dying a traumatic sudden death was really beyond horrifying for me. I had four healthy functional children. My husband and I are good people, all was well, and Boom!...


Grief is crying on the floor. So very loudly. Yet nobody is there to hear, or see, your horror.

Grief is the future missed. You would give anything for just one more hug. Or just one more kiss.



Grief can be very overwhelming and it leaves us with feeling of helplessness. Even with established stages of grief: anger, denial, bargaining, and acceptance...


The first year of my son's passing was a time of going from shock to unbearable pain to intense anger and back to shock. I became obsessed with having to know every detail of Joey's sudden death. Every moment had to be accounted for; every fine point regardless of how hard to hear had to be processed and listed. I don't know why I did this. Maybe because my out-of-contol guilt for not being...


As we wander through this world
Life has so many things in store
Sometimes we feel we can’t go on
Like we just can’t take anymore
But, on the darkest of our days...
There is a light that still shines bright
It keeps us going through our days
And watches over us as night
It is...


About a month after my son Joey passed, I woke early on a Sunday morning to find I had knocked a booklet of pictures off my nightstand. I am not good at putting pictures in albums. I kind of keep them scrunched in booklets or...


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