The Fear

The insecurities are very strong,
The thoughts and memories keep coming along.
I try to see this as a fresh start,
But I can't seem to convey that to my heart.
I do my best to think it's not the same,
But I will always feel like I am to blame.
I should have done things differently somehow,
I live so scared and always worrying now.
I don't sleep much I watch you closely everyday,
For forever together I always pray.
I ask to keep you with us longer,
The worry and doubt only grows stronger.
When I doze off I wake up panicked,
To check on you my heart is frantic.
I live life with you close I hold you near,
There's nothing worse than living with this constant fear.