Tips for Letting Go of Grief and Stepping Into Kingdom Living

Tips for Letting Go of Grief and Stepping into Kingdom Living

               You may be saying “Yeah, right!  How can living an abundant life without the one I love be even remotely possible?”   I can assure you it is.  With God all things are possible (Matthew 19:26).   I know because I am living this truth.  I wouldn’t have believed it myself just two short years ago when my beloved Johnny Angel, as I liked to call him, was lying on his death bed in a coma.  After all, he was literally all that I had and I was extremely frightened at the thought of being without him.  He had been my life, he had been my everything, he had been my reason for existing.  Now I not only believe in abundant living after losing my beloved, but I can testify to it and I am here to give all of you hope for a bright future for your lives.

     So you now find yourself in a dark, deep pit of despair and it feels totally hopeless, right?  It seems as though nothing or no one can reach down and pull you from the abyss of this painful misery that has become your life.  The days seem long, lonely, and cold.  You focus on the “what ifs” and “if onlys.” Your mind is stuck in the past of memories that were once vivid, but seem to be fading and are becoming hazy as you try your best to recapture every word, action, and emotion that was shared.  What does all of this living in the past do for you?  Does it help you heal? Does it help you move on? Does it help you let go?  The answer is no.  What you focus on becomes magnified.  Your grief and your loss become bigger.  It becomes bigger than you.  It encompasses you until you are saturated with pain and sorrow and the emptiness of yesterdays. 

     So what can you do? How on earth can you ever let all of this go and move on? You can’t. Not alone. Not completely, not here on this earth.  Look to Heaven and surrender to your Heavenly Father who is waiting with open arms for you to run to Him.  I promise you: He will restore you!  He is wondering what is taking you so long. Run to Him now.  Humble yourself before Him.  Maybe you don’t feel this is possible because you are angry with Him for taking your beloved.  Please understand that God didn’t cause the disease or accident that took your loved one.  The enemy did that!  He comes but to kill, steal, and destroy!  But Jesus said that He came so that we would have life and have it more abundantly (John 10:10).  Your anger is directed at the wrong person. Direct it at the enemy, not God.  But it’s okay if you have been angry with God.  He is a loving God and understands our emotions.  He created us and all that we are.  He can help you with the anger and the grief, too.

     You may be wondering, “How do I surrender to Him?” When my husband was in ICU in a coma, one night I went back to the hotel room.  I lie prostrate on the floor, which is in the shape of a cross.  I prayed that God would take my husband home and He would somehow take all the devastating grief that I was experiencing and turn it into something good that would bless the world.  It was the strangest thing.  I had this horrible gut-wrenching grief inside of me, but at the same time deep inside of me excitement began to stir.  I began to realize that God had heard my prayer and answered it.  He answered it so completely.  He has taken my grief and turned into something good as I am now using it to be a blessing to others. 

     Jesus tells us in scripture, “Whoever will lose his life for my sake shall find it”  (Matthew 16:25).  When we take our focus off of ourselves, and magnify our savior and His will for us, our problems become minuscule.  The barrier of negative energy that blocks His grace from flowing comes tumbling down and the waterfall of His love and tender mercy will come rushing forth like a great tidal wave and you will never, ever thirst again.  You will, at times, have fleeting moments of grief that well up in you.  But they will only be momentary because as soon as you call upon your Savior to pull you out of the pit, He will reach down and lift you up.  You didn’t think He was sent here just for our eternal salvation did you? He is our Savior for ALL things and that includes this terrible tragedy that you have been living.  His heart is breaking when yours is breaking!  He feels what you feel on a very real level and wants to heal you, so run to Him.  Pour out every single thing that is in your breaking heart.  Tell Him you need Him, you can’t do it without Him.  It is bigger than you and He has to take this from you.  Ask Him to turn it into good because you love Him and are called according to His purpose (Romans 8:28).  This is one of His great promises.  He tells us to keep Him in remembrance (Isaiah 43:26).  I frequently remind Him of His promises.  He promises to restore the broken-hearted (Luke 4:18).  That is you!  Remind Him!  Tell him you come boldly to His throne of grace and respectfully claim your divine birthright of abundant living and you have to be released from this grief to advance His kingdom and glorify Him.  After all, this is why He created you.  So do you think, then, He wants you to stay in this condition?  Believe me, He absolutely does not!  You can’t glorify Him when you are in the pit!  He wants to lift you up and out of there, so reach out to Him and accept every good thing that He has already blessed you with in the heavenly realms (Ephesians 1:3)  This includes your healing and deliverance from this devastating grief!

     Praise Him.  Do it now. He will show up.  God inhabits the praises of His people!  (Psalms 22:3)  I know – when you are in a pit, the last thing you feel like doing is praising God.  Don’t go by your feelings.  They will mislead you.  Go by these biblical principles I am sharing with you.  They work.  It is the only thing that works.  God is an awesome God.  He loves all of His children and doesn’t want to see them suffer.  He will deliver you.  All you have to do is believe it and receive it.  This is another one of His great promises and it is a biblical pattern.  I understand very well that false doctrine portrays Him to be an angry, vengeful God, but that is not who He is to His children that He adores.  I can say this with conviction because I truly know Him.

     When you have sunk into that pit again, try singing hymns out loud.  This will usher in the Holy Spirit and you will be overwhelmed with His presence.  Sometimes, I will make up my own lyrics if nothing else comes to mind at that moment.  The love you will experience from His Holy Spirit will be exalting.  When you are in His presence, you will be transformed.  I promise you!  Try it and see what happens.  Force yourself if you have to.  Every time you begin to sink into the pit, praise Him and sing Hymns. When I use these techniques, my deliverance is usually instant!  Your Father in Heaven loves you beyond what you could ever comprehend and wants you healed, whole, healthy and prosperous in all things! God blesses you and keeps you and makes His face to shine upon you and lifts His countenance up to you and gives you His peace. Amen!