Grief: How to Get Rid of Brain Fog

Brain fog. What is it, really? 

Brain fog is a lack of attention. It's feeling like you simply cannot pay attention to anything for more than a few seconds. It can be overwhelming when your grief is new.

You want to read some useful, comforting novel about grief. Checking through Amazon for just those types of books is quite helpful. So you choose a book that you like (something like this one), check the price, and then download it to your mobile device or desktop compy. 

You look at the first page and it is very comforting. You start to relax a little bit between the sobs. You turn the page.

          Oh, my God! All those words. How can I possibly focus? 

Then you close the device, lie down, and sink into your misery once again. 

Sound familiar? That was me in the first few months after my Robert passed. I really wanted to read those comforting words (well, not my own words; words from various other authors) but I just could not. The idea of channeling my focus for more than about ten sentences was just too exhausting. It was just too much of a challenge. 

Then there is the "forgetting". Similar to the famous "pregnancy brain" the "grief brain" seems just as forgetful. You eventually do remember but it might be hours later. I used quite a few coping strategies such as making lists, making notes on my phone and asking my son to remind me of necessary plans but I knew I had to get to the bottom of this complex problem sooner than later. 

I decided to tackle this challenge with nutrition. I'm not a nutritionist so I won't give advice here--I'm simply telling you what definitely worked for me. 

          Coconut oil

Are you surprised? I started adding half a teaspoon to my coffee. I was amazed at the quick energy it gave me but more than that, it cleared my mind. I found my focus. I started getting back to having my usual strong memory. I was able to complete reading novels once again. (Not that I'm particularly a focused-type person: I usually always have a pretty short attention span but I keep at it.) Coconut oil tends to make you visit the ladies room fairly often, so you need to restrict the amounts you consume for a few days and gradually work yourself up to about a teaspoonful per cup of coffee. I normally drink coffee three times per day. Do the math! For me, it didn't matter which brand I got. They were all the same. I'm not advocating any particular brand. 

Of course, any oil is just fat: too much will clog your arteries. I have read extensively about short chain/medium chain/long chain triglycerides and the bottom line is still that too much will clog your arteries. You don't need to be a nutritionist to know that. Whenever I need energy I use it either in coffee or on food in place of butter. 

As the year passed I was able to get out into nature more often and needed the coconut oil less and less. I still felt focused when I needed to read or remember. 

I think my brain needed some downtime to subconsciously process the death of my husband and attract a future beautiful life for me. Coconut oil helped me retrain my priorities in a more highly energetic milieu. I'm so thankful that brain fog didn't last more than a few months. 

Everything is just so exhausting when the Aftersmash is new. I hated that sensation of grief-exhaustion and I'm grateful for coconut oil. Simple yet effective for me. 

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