World Wide Candle Lighting 2016

World Wide Candle Lighting

12/11/16

I sit here by myself

In total darkness

With Christmas tree lights

And candles.

Tonight is the one night a year where people around the world come together and light a candle in memory of a child who has died. The candles are lit at 7:00 in each time zone. It becomes a wave honoring our children.

I have created an alter with a picture of my son, Kenny, and my brother, Hal. There is a Buddha candle in the middle and 21 candles in a circle. These 21 candles represent the children of people I know. Kenny and Hal are included in the 21. When I think of the number of candles being lit tonight, the number is unimaginable. We are connected by the light. We share a common bond and understanding.

Today I got a Christmas tree. I put it up then wrapped white lights around it. Kenny’s last Christmas in 2001 was the last time I decorated my tree. Today it felt right to do so. I only put on the special decorations. Some handmade ones given to Kenny, some that he had made and the dated ones I would buy every year. There was one dated 2002 that I had forgotten. I bought it the year he died because that was my tradition. It just didn’t feel right not to buy one that year. I never opened it. It never hung on a tree till this year.

The Buddha candle will burn for one hour. The exact length of the time of the service.  I decided to sit in silence as the candles burned themselves out. It took over two hours. This gave me time to remember, to honor and to hold all of the families in sacred loving space. The light of the candles may have dwindled, but the light of our children’s lives will continue forever.

Ann Lindner

Kenny's Loving Mom