EMOTIONS: THEY COME ON STRONG LIKE A TYPHOON YET LEAVE AS FAST AS THEY CAME

The last couple of days I've noticed just how strong along with fast the emotions come on.  No matter what day, what time, where you are, the emotions take a strong hold on you, leaving you feeling paralysed with tears in your eyes no matter who is around.  Grief takes no thoughts on where or who is around.  I think it hits us harder due to the fact we feel it still should not feel this heart wrenching.  That is the problem we're so worried of how it should be that we worry it is not suppose to feel like this still.  Not true, these emotions will forever come into our hearts,  we need to understand that there not here to stay.  It is only our hearts reminding us that our loved ones passed will forever be missed.  Say good bye to what people say about how you should feel to understand grieving will always be a part of our heart.

Don't suppress your feelings they are there for a reason, it is part of who we are, to stress about the emotions you still feel only makes it worse.  Often times it is triggered by something in remembrance of, for me when I look to my daughter the thoughts of her growing up with out her Daddy, that he left her too soon, that his love for her was a love that should be here, that she was robbed of such UNCONDITIONAL LOVE is what brings the emotions inside me leaving me feeling a pain that is indescribable along with paralysed.  I wear my emotions proud, never embarrassed, never trying to hide behind it, always straight forward to speak of it if approached or seen.  Let go of the feelings of guilt for still feeling the pain, it is our hearts way of reminding us that what we have been through was something that will never be forgotten.

Embrace your pain, give it time to impact your body, hold on strong, remember it is not there to stay just to stop by to make sure you have not forgotten that your old life you had to let go was of great momentous, that your heart is blessed with true love, true love always remains, that is why we feel the emotions of a typhoon rushing through us, true love wants you to remember it will always be with you no matter where you are in this world.  Statistics are just words, leave them behind you, understand that in grief we will always remember the beauty of the scar that shines bright out to the world showing we were gifted with the truest of love in our life.  People who put limits on grieving I believe do it due too the fact that it may give hope as well as positive feelings to those grieving to know that in time the pain will subside.  It is true the pain eases, yet sometimes the pain is as though how it was on the day you lost your loved ones passed, that is when you have to understand that it is not there to stay as well as it is normal.  The most important thing is to know as fast as it came it will leave, also to not judge yourself, to not feel guilty, to not feel you are different as well as feel you must be doing something wrong. It has been one year for me, no matter how bad of a day I have I understand it is OK, that it does not mean I'm not healing, that something is wrong, I just understand it is a part of who I am.

When emotions hit fast I take them one second at a time.

Through the emotions I often times find myself feeling as though I am failing, the strong emotions come on so quick as well as hard that often it leaves us breathless, it leaves us in shock not having the time to think.  Just take a step back, take the time you need to get back to your feet, then hold on tight to push forward telling yourself "this is not abnormal, like all the other times it will pass".  We all have it in us to make it past yet another whirl wind of emotions, that through out the pain the beauty awaits to hug you.  Your hopes restore, your smile takes form, your memory returns, your thoughts remind you that it has happened so many times yet here you still are, no matter how many times we get knocked down we rise back up in honor of the true love our lives were gifted.  It is because of our loved ones passed we will always rise above.  Our loved ones passed will never let us fall to stay down, our loved ones passed will forever carry us through our life.  Forever they will be sending blessings in our life, the doors to all of what we dream will open.  Believe in your heart that our loved ones passed will take care of us always even though not to be seen.

NOTE TO ALL:  Our hearts will forever be feeling the typhoon of pain, understand that as fast as it appears it will leave.  How strong the pain is does not mean you are failing the process of grieving, it only means that your heart has loved the biggest.  Do not allow yourself to believe that time has control on grief, true love is forever, there is no hold nor time on true love.  In fact that is why we will always carry grief with us, true love is forever, so forever will our hearts feel it.  Your strength will be enough, even in times of doubt.  Our loved ones passed will forever remain.  The emotions of grief will forever leave footprints in our hearts.  Do not despair the pain you feel, it is, it will always be a part of life, it is normal, just know YOU ARE OK AND NOT FAILING.  Time is not a part of it, love is.  Starting this blog I was asked do you have a diploma?, certificate?, anything for psychology?, being through it is my degree, knowing the emotions as well as experiences I've been through is what comes from my heart, still going through it is more than anything that can be taught to me.  I take all of what I have been through to share it through words for everyone to take comfort in knowing they are not different nor abnormal, also in hopes you all that read take some kind of comfort in my experiences, that even just a little it may help you.  I always make sure each post I type comes from my heart out to all of yours.