Holiday Wishes

So, I made my Christmas wish today and of course it did not come true. It is impossible to bring you back, the reasonable part of me knows this. But, in 6 days I will make the same wish for New Years. I will wish that when I wake up on January 1st, that it will be 2014 and you will be at the house fixing the traditional pork and sauerkraut. My goal wont be to save you, but I will try as hard I can to, my main goal is to change how I spend the last 4 months and 20 days with you. I will spend less time working and stressing. Less time with people and things that do not matter near as much as you. Less time time fussing and being frustrated with you over such small, silly things. Spending more time listening to you and your stories about your mom and your sister. Spening more time bringing the kids to see you. Taking more trips, laughing more, supporting you more, understanding you more. The reasonable part of me knows that this is impossible and my New Years Wish wont come true either, the part of me that loves and misses you beyond reason will make that wish anyways. 

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I'm Grieving, Now What?