Here I Stay ~A Poem

So Here I Stay

I love you even more with each day that passes. 
How is my heart suppose to mend?
Life goes on for everyone else while I stand still.

I'm watching life pass me by.
Not wanting to move.
Not wanting to breathe.
Not wanting to move from this place.

I don't want to leave you behind.
I want to stay with you here in this place.
Here in the moments that I feel you are still.
Still around me, inside the depths of my soul, still with me.
Our souls of two, only one.

I could feel the indescribable pain of losing you before you left.
We as one could feel what was to come.
The inevitable ripping apart of two hearts made into one.
And now only a half. Half of our love. Half of our soul.

I can't move, I can't breathe.
I don't want to move. I don't want to breathe.
I don't want to lose the moments that are forever etched in my memory in time.
How do I go on without you? How do I move?

I still see every moment of pain that was in your eyes.
The pain of you not wanting to move.
Not wanting to leave.
Not wanting our hearts to be ripped apart.

You are now with Jesus.
You are now in Paradise.
You are now happy.
You are now young again.
You are now without that dreaded evil.

I love you, I miss you, I want you back.
I don't want to move from this place
If I move, I may forget.
I may not be able to feel.
I may not be able to remember.

So, here I stay.
Trying to breathe.
Trying not to move.
Trying to keep you.

So here I stay.
In my own time and space.
Feeling the moments that were you.
That were once you and me.

My Beloved Barry​ Bear

Written by: Lisa Beckermann