Find a sense of calm in life but never give up
Yes, losing a child in life is unfathomable; the heart ache gets unbearable some days especially during times we see something which reminds us of the loss child or you just want to turn around to comment but you face a void blank space. It doesn’t matter what age the child passes away, the heart ache is all the same, the loss is so great, we feel like we might bust. Last night I thought about my oldest son Charlie and our last conversation, it ended with four words, “I love you Momma!” Those words keep me going in life, love doesn’t leave us nor does our child, as they journey along with us.
We recently were very lucky to be able to remodel our home. During this time I decided it was about time to pack away some of our family pictures. So, I boxed up most of Charlie’s picture I had hanging on our living room wall. A few days later I noticed a change in our son BJ, things came to my mind: Was it because of the change of flooring? Was it because moving things made such a great change? Or was it taking down Charlie’s pictures? I do have a few small pictures by my computer of Charlie. When life crisis hit a family we must think what’s best for not only the grieving parents but for our surviving child. Charlie’s pictures are safe boxed up in our attic, but seeing BJ come out of his shell brings glory to my heart.
The first change we made after losing Charlie was holiday traditions, BJ wanted to try different ways to celebrate the holidays. Yes, I know most find celebrating holidays really hard but find a way to make it your own, like taking a vacation, or not even decorating that first year, sounds bad but it’s about taking care of you, we must keep living no matter how hard it might be. This year we are neither decorating for Halloween nor giving out treats, tradition can be change it’s up to you to make the changes in your life. Changes doesn’t need to be expensive, move a picture, a chair, change your furniture around, try anything to make your life easier.
Find an easy way to bring peace into your life, sit and think about the changes you can make in each room to calm your soul. Maybe a tradition of having coffee in a quiet part of the house in the morning, or sit outside watch nature before the temperature drops. I hope everyone can find a sense of calm in life but never give up.
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