In grief we need to be accepted as we are

Tools for finding hope along the journey: Finding validation


Sometimes the people closest to us find our grief difficult to validate. It isn’t that they don’t understand that we are grieving but sometimes they are hurting themselves as well. They may be grieving the person who has died or hurting for us. Our pain becomes hard for them to be around. They want us to feel better out of love. Letting these people know that how we are grieving is normal and asking them to accept us as we are is an important step toward hope.

Artwork by Tanya Lord
About the Artist

Tanya Lord was a special education teacher when Noah died. After his death she read The Institute of Medicine’s report To Err Is Human and realized that the errors responsible for her son’s death were not unique. This created a desire and determination to better understand and work towards improving health care. Currently she has completed a master’s degree in public health and a PhD in clinical and population health research and is completing a post-doctoral fellowship. Lord shares her personal and professional experiences in presentations and workshops for medical staff and students focusing on the importance of effective communication with patients before and after an error. She also is a co-founder of The Grief Toolbox (www.thegrieftoolbox.com), which offers tools to help those along the grief journey. Lord may be contacted at [email protected]