Grief IS Love

Origin unknown – I read an article somewhere, some time ago on this topic and edited, shortened and added some of my own thoughts to it for my own purposes, but thought to share it with others who may get some benefit. (Italics in the article are my thoughts – ZellFred)

YES, you can maintain your love relationship with your loved one after death.
 
Although the physical presence in the relationship is lost you are still connected emotionally and spiritually.

Grief is still love and that relationship does not end with death.  Grief is simply another expression of the love.  Grief is the continued love for the person who died as well as the agonizing yearning to be in the loved one’s presence.  Death may have removed the physical presence of our loved one, but the spiritual and emotional attachments remain and can still be nurtured and experienced.

The real struggle comes from our natural human response to reject death.  The thought that one moment a loved one is there and the next minute gone is a harsh, painful concept.  We know the consequences of death, but we do not want to feel forced to live with this distressing truth.

“Giving up” our loved one is not our wish and this is not the way that we feel life should be.  Therefore, we as protesting mourners create a longer, harder struggle for ourselves.  We do not want to stop loving the one who has died, and we do not want to leave them in our past. 

We feel we constantly have to hide that fact from onlookers and loved ones as we are accused of “living in the past”.  So we keep it to ourselves – or try to - and consequently we isolate ourselves.  We feel misunderstood, resentful towards a world that refuses to understand.

Knowing grief is the continued expression of love helps us understand that we do not have to “give up” or “let go” on the one who died.  We can live with the comforting thought that we carry loved ones into our future.  Knowing grief is love is an empowering insight which does not eliminate the struggle of grief, but it can make the intense battle against the loss less difficult. 

We can allow ourselves to “love on” guiltless and free from condemnation!!