Something all moms and Teenage girls need to know

I am not a author,vendor,nor run a support group. I am a grieving mother. I wanted to share my story with everyone so my daughters death is not in vain and will hopefully bring awareness to others so no one else has to endure this kind of pain.

My 16 year old daughter, Theresa died on August 16, 2010. Theresa died from a pulmonary embolism, caused by a blood clot, caused by the birth control pill. Before I tell her story, please note that I am not against the birth control pill.

Theresa was a very healthy young girl, if I took her to the doctor once a year, that was a lot. Theresa came to me a month before her 16th birthday and told me she had sex and wanted to go on the pill. Of course I felt she was too young, but I did agree with her that she should go on the pill or another type of birth control. I took her to my Ob gyn that also delivered her as a baby. We all talked about different methods of birth control and the doctor said she would put Theresa on a low dosage called Othro Cept. We were aware of the risks but the doctor felt Theresa would have no problems with the pill.
A month and a half after she started the pill, Theresa was out with her friends the whole day. I remember so clearly my phone ringing at 8:30 PM to find her father on the other end of the phone. He told me Theresa was sick and he was calling an ambulance. I rushed over to the pizza place she was in with her 2 friends and she was laying on the stretcher and unconscious. As soon as we got in the ambulance they started CPR on her. The ambulance did not have the paddles so we had to wait for another ambulance. The other ambulance came but for some reason our ambulance started driving again to take her to the hospital. I knew she was gone by then.

The same week we got the autopsy report that said she died from a blood clot in her leg that shut down her lungs. I was told Theresa had a blood clot disorder called Factor V. No one with this disorder should ever go on the birth control pill. Everyone in our family had to be tested for this disorder and I found out that I am the one that passed it onto her. I never knew I had it nor did I ever know factor V existed.

I found out a simple blood test is all she needed to know she should not go on the pill. The doctor told me they do not tell people about this blood test cause the insurance companies do not cover it. I was appalled that I was not given the choice to have her take it with me paying for it.

It turns out 1 out of 10,000 die from this, so money is the option here instead of saving lives. My daughters life did not matter, she was just a statistic.

The night Theresa died, she was in distress in a pizza place (that knew her) for 45 minutes. Not one person came to her aid cause they thought she was on drugs (she never took drugs). The only time a worker came up to her was when she vomited. They told her "its disgusting, and to clean it up".

This story is for two reasons. First if you see ANYONE in distress, you need to call 911, not sit there and watch them die. Second anyone going on the birth control pill, no matter what brand it is, needs to demand the blood test first. Since Theresa has died, I have been spreading the word about this blood test and many people (including boys) have come up positive with this disorder.

Theresa is gone almost 2 years. She was and still is the most important person in my life. Her death not only killed her, but has killed me too. I am physically alive, but my spirit is gone. This year (2nd year) has been a horror. When Theresa died we had just mailed out her sweet 16 invitations that week. This year she would have been graduating high school and going on to college to get a degree in social work. Theresa wanted to work with project children.

To honor Theresa we had a memorial concert on the day that would have been her sweet 16 party. With my nephew being in the music business, Theresa knew many stars. We had famous performers at the concert as well as other stars sending in videos about Theresa. We raised over $16,000.00 that started a scholarship under her name. I will continue to keep Theresa's memory alive........but the best way is to get the word out about the blood test. Please do not let the doctors put anyone on the pill without taking the blood test first. It is not worth losing someone nor the pain that the living still has to go through. My life went from a normal middle class person, to someone just waiting to die now.


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About the Author
I am 47 years old and live in NYC. The only thing I have EVER wanted out of life was a child. I had the most amazing daughter for 16 years that was my world. I am now living (not by choice) a life that is a roller coaster. Since my daughters death I have learned many things. How inconsiderate people are,how our medical system only cares about statistics,who my true friends are,and how lives can change within seconds. I am glad I found the Grief Toolbox, where I can finally associate with others that understand and do not judge.
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