Breathing Again!

     As time goes bye I wonder how I will feel when the seconds, minutes, hours, days, weeks, and months turn into years. The day that my mother passed away I thought I would never be able to breathe again. My entire existence became a question mark. Where do I go from here? What if I need advice? What if my child get's sick and I need a mommy remedy? What if I wake up in the middle of the night and need a scripture? What if, What if!!!! These past 9 months and 23 days have proven to be the most challenging times of my adult life.

     Loosing a loved one can be a very traumatic time for anyone. BUT loosing a MOTHER is a feeling that no one could ever imagine or explain. I finally had to realize that what I was missing from my mommy was inside of me. I learned that she was such a great mother that she had already prepared my father, siblings, and myself for her passing.

     I found a new sense or peace and eventually I was able to breathe again. My heart was renewed because even in her passing she was still looking out for me. On the day that she died my son was in the same hosiptal going in for major surgery. That night while I was sleeping by his bedside she came to me, and helped me tell him about her passing. Then 17 days later she brought my highschool sweetheart back into my life after 26 years apart. She then continued to be by my side as I had my final breast cancer surgery.

     So just because your mother is no longer here in the flesh she will always be here in spirit and in your heart. If you feel like you can't breathe just close your eyes and let her breathe for you.