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Guilt is conniving, clever, and sneaky. He delights in lies and accusation. He shows no mercy to wounded hearts.

Guilt is not our friend.

Regrets can have incredible power

“I feel so guilty. Ronnie and I had a fight before he passed, and I never apologized. I didn’t tell him I loved him that night either,” Barb said.

“And that’s just the beginning. There’s so much I wanted to say to him, but never did,” she continued.

Barb loved and adored her husband Ronnie. Now, not-her-friend Guilt sought to steal her memories of joy and fill her mind with her “mistakes.”

Regrets have incredible power. They can quickly ravage your heart.


Guilt is sneaky

Guilt is sneaky. It tries to trick you into living in the realm of what-if and if-only. Once you engage with guilt, life can rapidly turn into an emotional treadmill that’s difficult to step off of.

Yet, regrets are real, and you must deal with them.

Own up to what’s yours. Ask forgiveness. Just hearing yourself say it out loud will have an impact.

Then do the hardest thing: forgive yourself.

Here’s a grief affirmation for today:

“I’ll remember you by forgiving myself for what I did and didn’t do.”

Forgive. Ask forgiveness. Forgive yourself. Send guilt packing.


Adapted from the award-winning bestseller Heartbroken: Healing from the Loss of a Spouse

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About the Author

Gary Roe is an author, speaker, and chaplain with Hospice Brazos Valley. He is the author of the award-winning bestsellers Shattered: Surviving the Loss of a Child, Please Be Patient, I'm Grieving, HEARTBROKEN: Healing from the Loss of a Spouse, and Surviving the Holidays without You and the co-author (with New York Times Bestseller Cecil Murphey) of Saying Goodbye: Facing the Loss of a Loved One. Visit him at

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