No one knows me……

No one knows me,
I seem so carefree.
No one knows me,
They don’t see the pain inside of me.
No one knows this girl I have become,
The girl that wanted to end it all and be done.
No one knows the grief,
The unsure and disbelief.
No one knew the thoughts that ran through my head,
The moment I knew you were “dead?”.
The girl they know laughs and smiles in the light,
The girl I know cries and cries all through the night.
No one knows the agony I feel,
I suck it up and try to deal.
No one knows I’m broken beyond repair,
The hurt the torture and despair. 
I try to find comfort knowing you’re in heaven,
My hearts in pieces though nine, ten…….. eleven.
I try to put on this mask and hide,
I did my best I really tried.
With you my future seemed so bright,
With you gone I cannot find the light.
I try to find this girl that used to be so happy with you,
I lost her when they said “code blue!”.
People say mean things to me,
What they don’t know is I’m struggling enough can’t you see.
My heart once beat just for you,
Now I’m lost, broken, you were my glue.
Daddy and I miss you so,
I beamed so bright but I’ve lost my glow.
Although they’ve known me for years and years,
No one knows me not even me through all my tears.