For my master’s thesis, I interviewed several people who worked in professions that dealt with death. I was almost forty-years old when I embarked on this project and I had only lost a grandmother when I was young. (Or, so I thought. I’ll get to that.) It was my hope that my interaction with these people could help me overcome my fear of death.
Father’s Day can never be the same.
Father’s Day was just around the corner; this was going to be the fifth Father’s day where I would both celebrate my father and my being a father. In the short time I had spent in this window of being both a father and a son I had learned so very much. My son had taught me that the world was so much bigger than me, he had made me a better man. Being a father had also offered me the perspective and appreciation for many of the things my father had done for me when I was little.
“Father’s Day – Conflict”
Here we are, another event that is about to occur that triggers emotions in men that have lost a child (or have lost a dad for that matter), Father’s Day. Since I have lost two children during different times of the year, I have the pleasure of dealing with multiple event triggers throughout the year. It seems like my wife and I are constantly thinking about birthdays, death days, Holidays, Father’s and Mother’s Day.
My dad was my hero. He was a good man... I always felt taken care of. I have always been a pretty independent person but when he died I felt like who's going to take care of me now? Who's going to worry about me like he worried about me? That was when my mom was still here, and it's true she cared for me and worried about me, but there was something about my dad's strength that I just could not let go of.
The truth is, no one will love you like your dad and no one could ever fill his shoes... but there are people who want to love you if you look around.
This is Suzette’s story, as told by Katie Ryan.
I must admit, I'm not certain that I have the credentials to make this submission. I have not experienced the impact of death that so many live with each day. I've been a compassionate bystander as close friends and co-workers have found themselves thrust into their own circumstances. As a former Marine Corps Sergeant I served as part of a special duty team that provided full honors for fallen and former Marines as part of their military funeral services.
My point, I've seen grief but I am blessed to have never had to cope personally.
Losing someone close to you is a tragedy that we all must experience throughout life. As devastating as it may be, we must try to find the good that comes from death. For many people, death is a wake-up call, telling them that it's time to start living life differently - better. Take this time to look closely at your life and find ways to make it more meaningful.
Set Aside More Time for Family
When most people think of therapy, they think of a big couch, ink blots and an expensive hourly rate. Just because the thought of traditional therapy with a psychologist doesn't sit well with you doesn't mean you shouldn't undergo some type of therapy treatment to help with the healing process. Everyone should have that one activity that has a therapeutic effect on them. Find your therapeutic activity and let it help you through your grieving process. If you're not sure what that activity is yet, try out a few techniques and see what works for you.
