Despite the pain our lives are better and richer because our loved one was and still is part of our lives. Creating a lasting legacy as a way to honour your loved one not only helps you move through your grief but can help you live a better life. As Sogyal Rinpoche says in The Tibetan Book of Living and Dying we can end up living lives of greater depth and purpose which gives our loved one’s death even greater meaning.
Any thoughts you have that start with the words would, could and should are an indicator that you are experiencing some beliefs that are not helping you move through grief. In fact having beliefs with these three words can prolong your grief and cause you even greater pain.
When we experience the death of a loved one we are thrown into a world of unknown emotions. For some of us we may be experiencing emotions that we’ve never had before. It’s important to recognise that there are no right or wrong emotions when it comes to loss. It’s also important to recognise that not everyone will feel the same way as you. We all have different relation
It’s continually espoused that the anniversary of the death of a loved one, their birthdays, Christmases, Weddings and other special life events can be particularly challenging after the death of a loved one. These times are known to increase the absence that we feel of our loved one in our life. They are also known for triggering negative memories and causing old grief to resurface.
Grieving the loss of a loved one comes in as many forms as there are people grieving. A significant part of the process of the loss can be honoring this loss, honoring the person who has passed and honoring the self in that loss.
Traditional honoring
The biggest secret in adapting to loss and massive change is to fully understand and strongly believe that it all begins from the inside. This simply means, while it is good to have a nurturing support network and a safe place to go with your emotions, in the final analysis, what you do, specifically the choices you make is the big difference. Your decisions alone will result in adapting to and living with the pain of your great loss or adding unnecessary suffering to the process.
EXPLAINING DEATH TO YOUR CHILD/CHILDREN:
SIMPLE GESTURES TO COMFORT THEM
What can we do to help when someone we know has experienced a death of a loved one?
By Tanya Lord
“What can we do?”
“Let us know if there is anything at all we can help with”
As noted in an earlier post, the National Students of AMF Support Network is dedicated to supporting college students coping with the illness or death of a loved one, and empowering all college students to fight back against terminal illness. To accomplish its mission, the organization helps students start local chapters nationwide.
