Life after a funeral | The Grief Toolbox

Life after a funeral doesn’t need to be spent in what ifs or what could have been; it’s time to reach out to your family. Everyone is going through their own turmoil as we age: Health, making ends meet, the death of family, friends and even sadly the death of our children. So, it’s now has been six years since we buried our oldest son, Charlie.

I kept thinking what Charlie would like me to do to help me in my grief, then it came to me to throw a huge family reunion.

This summer I asked my husband if he minded if we threw a huge family reunion for my side. My husband isn’t much into family reunions, but he gave me the go ahead.

What I am saying, family reunions can be any size, anywhere, just call or send out invitations to your close family members or maybe it could be just a handful of family.

Reaching out to your family even friends you think as your family can help through the grief journey.

At my family reunion, I told my family the story of my life, how I retired from my nine-year job to now writing my second novel about Charlie and writing to help others through grief. I had all the Mom’s who lost a child stand, then proceeded to give each of them a crystal rose for they know I am right there for them in this journey.

As a young child Mom’s family would have card parties, where they shared stories of family, enjoyed each others company, just being together with people we love helps us with our grief, and we don’t need to feel alone.

Make the call to reunite with family, friends, even make new friends with others going through the grief journey. No, I won’t use the word process because grief doesn’t go away it’s a lifetime journey with some good days, bad days and those terrible days where you feel no one cares.

I have one cousin reaching out to me; he is my God Father in the Catholic faith. I have never spoken to him in all my life. He lives far away from me but for reasons unknown to me he feels the need to reach out to me. I feel it's God’s plan, so I am looking forward to this.

One must not turn away from those wishing to reconnect with you proceed with caution but never doubt people are out there willing to help you through grief.

About the Author

Author J. A. Diller writes with a purpose. She hopes to provide inspiration and a sense of hope through engaging works of fiction. The focus of her work is to deliver the message that with family, faith and courage, nothing is impossible. While her work is considered fiction, it flows from personal experience. Judy lost her son Charlie at the age of 23. While a life event of this magnitude can and does wreck lives, Diller took another path. The event served as a catalyst that served to allow her to bring messages of hope to others in need. Judy has never believed that death is the end. “As I was writing the book, I started to feel at peace within myself,” stated Judy. “I would hear Charlie telling me in my mind what he went through with school bullying, depression, struggle with self image – I could write for hours not ever glancing at the clock. Charlie’s character in ‘Beyond Life’ is Feshy, the hero who stands his ground against all odds, and tries to rebuild his family elders’ relationships.” Issues like bullying, depression and self image are heavy topics for young minds. Judy’s treatment of these subjects leads children and parents gently to a singular and SDFSDF conclusion. Regardless of any challenge we must face, our family will always be with us, our faith will always sustain us and, given just a bit of courage, nothing is impossible.

I'm Grieving, Now What?

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