Words for the Journey

Over the last 7 years, I have followed a very contorted murder trial. It ended just recently with life without the possibility of parole. The murderers only claim to fame was not only how she murdered a good man but how she keep murdering him in court. A devastated family had to sit through years of deep sorrow and rage.

  What is it that lingers for you?  Is it guilt, anger, and frustration?  Do you feel guilty because you should have done more in the life of the one you lost?  Are you angry because they left you too soon?  Are you frustrated because no one in the world around you understa

Crossed Over If I say my son passed away, that leaves no explanation as to where he is?If I say his life has expired, then that concludes an end, yet eternity is forever!

CURRENT STATE Grief is a sensitive issue and an issue we all face. These are my experences and the truth of my journey and studies in this area. My words are simply signposts for you to guide you back into your own truth.

Eight years have passed since our daughter (mother of our twin grandchildren), father-in-law, my brother, and our twin grandchildren’s father died. Time has eased the pain of losing four family members within nine months. Still, the emotional pain is there, smoldering and waiting to burst into flame.

So Here I Stay

After the sudden passing of my youngest sister and then within months, my husband passed as well, I was carrying around tissue boxes everywhere I went. I began to measure my grief progress by how many boxes I had.

As a kid, our most inner desire is to be accepted and fit in with those around us. Get rejected enough and that desire becomes a shield against life's cruelty. Some bury that desire and eventually have no need to fit anywhere. Others will search all their lives for that acceptance.

I still remember the day we moved into this home I have come to cherish. I was 23 and Keith was 11 months old. My first house.....so adorable on this lovely street with its fenced in yard. Quickly turning the back bedroom into a Sesame Street themed boy's dream....we began our life here.

I am so very tired, deep down to my core, of hearing platitudes that sound like, "Give it time, it will get better."Yes, I realize these words are meant to be comforting. However in reality, they aren't. All such words do is keep me from sharing with you how I am truly faring.

For me, it was the loss of life of my loved one especially my son Charlie at age 23 in 2009.I tried to be strong, but after losing Charlie my body had all it could tolerant, my heart starting racing as much as my mind.What just happened? How could this happen to us? Why didn't Charlie fight harder to survive?

It’s said to be one of the worst things that can happen to a person: experiencing the death of a child.There’s a story behind each child lost. My unhappy journey began in 2009, when my oldest son Charlie, 23, died of pneumonia.