Words for the Journey

 Grief hurts.  It’s tough to go through, and painful to watch.One or both of the following is true about almost all of us almost all of the time:

He would have been forty… 

Just one step at a time. Just breathe. You can do this. If you've done this once, you can do it again. Way to go!

Like a magnet, we are pulled toward our purpose with signs, intuitions and synchronicities.  John Holland

There are certain moments in life that alter the entire direction of fate; unknowingly, at age 20, I was about to live through one of those. It was during my undergraduate years when everything is still rather carefree and I still was trying to find my way, when I found out that I was pregnant. Extremely surprising, unplanned and earth shattering, I discovered I was already 13 weeks along.

166 days since I last spoke or saw you.Death changes everything.Time changes nothing.I miss the sound of your voice.I miss our conversations and your advice.Small decisions are now hard.I miss your presence, your touch.I miss making new memories and sharing old ones.

      I know that you are gone from my sightYet my love for you has never missed a beat

Our true home is in HeavenAnd we are simply traveling throughThis life is just a chapter

The season has ended. Blossoms of purples and whites fill my sight. I pass through the fields of heather and look beyond the sea. A peacefulness settles in the misty dew surrounding my body and filling my senses. I am with someone. A beautiful feeling of pure and abundant love emanates sparkles of light that reach deep within my soul. It is my son. He reaches for my hand and helps me up.

Fifteen Years On.

Spring awakens with the dawn of a new day. A new day that I get up and try to feel for my existence. It doesn't come. I'm here but I am not. Twenty eight months. I've come a long way but yet not so far. My needs are small in comparison but simplistically impossible. I want to see your beautiful face. Your twinkling eyes. Your quirky smile.

I'm an introvert. I like people but I kind of like solitude more. And by "solitude" I also include time alone with my late husband while he was alive and also now that he has passed beyond this earth. During our time together Robert was always just so accommodating that it was as comfortable being in his company as being alone. He was just so darn easy to be with.